Article by Ben Haynes
Being a bottom is a full-time job. There, I said it! As a bottom, we tend to be the butt of every joke told in the gay community (and sometimes, deservedly so!). But all jokes aside, there's more to us than just a hole. We'd love it if our tops took note.
We All Have Different Kinks
What worked for your last bottom probably won't work for your next one. All holes are different. After all, you know how our holes feel better than we do, right? Some bottoms are into more aggressive play than others. Communication is vital to ensuring your bottom gives you 10s across the board. Ask your bottom what he likes, and especially pay attention to what he doesn't. Listen to and learn the differences in his moans. If it sounds like he's in pain, he might be. For some bottoms, pain is what gets them off. For others, it makes them report to their friends that you had no clue what you were doing, and you're likely to never hear from him again. Understanding what your bottom likes and needs might guarantee repeat visits, so don't be shy ask!
No, We Don’t “Just Lay There”
This is a common misconception that active or power bottoms would very much like if it were dispelled immediately. The world is filled with pillow princesses, and the gay community does, in fact, have its fair share of them. However, most of us don't get down like that. We may lie down sometimes, but don't get it twisted- we are working. Some tops are incredibly well-endowed, and we are teaching our bodies to embrace and welcome their girth into our holes, inch by inch. This is a full-time job, depending on the top's dick and his dominance.
Also, the more submissive the bottom, the more they are likely working their ass off (sometimes, quite literally) to please their top. This can leave us incredibly worn out and exhausted when we blow our loads.
Do You Know How Much Time We Spent Getting Ready?!
It's the subject of countless humorous memes on social media: a bottom has spent half an hour douching, and the water still won't run clear. Tops and bottoms all have their various preferences when it comes to pre-sex rituals. Some bottoms refuse to douche, and some tops don't mind that. However, a large number of people in both communities prefer and appreciate it when proper pre-sex hygiene has been observed.
It's common for some bottoms to experience frustration at how much effort and time can go into these types of routines. If you're a top, please remember this before you abruptly cancel or ghost on your upcoming dick appointment. (Do tops call it a dick appointment too, or, to them, is it a "hole engagement?")
If We Could Choose to be Tops, We Probably Wouldn’t
Despite being teased and picked on for our sexual desires and preferences, we wouldn't change a thing about ourselves. We love perfecting our asses for your viewing, grabbing, and fucking pleasures. We get off on how tops crave us, fantasize about us, use, squeeze, and fuck us senseless. We obsess over the perfect pair of underwear that will accentuate what we're working with every time.
Though it's not easy being a bottom, and at any time, there is stiff competition for the hottest top at the bar, our community can all agree upon our love for the intensely sexual and exciting life of being a bottom.