Article by Ben Haynes
Sometimes in life, a face that once meant everything to you resurfaces. Times like these can bring about a range of feelings for anybody. One thing you might find yourself wondering when this happens is, "What if we got back together?"
Exploring what might have been or could be with any past relationship is perfectly healthy. However, if you're genuinely considering getting back together with an ex, it's time to ask some crucial questions.
How Much Has He Changed?
Let's face it: your relationship with this person ended for a reason (or maybe several of them). You can only get back together with someone if you carefully assess who they used to be versus who they are now.
If you notice that there has been a significant shift in the person who stands before you, asking for your love again, it could be worth your time to explore the possibilities. However, if all you see is the exact same person from whenever you last dated, odds are they have stayed the same, and it might not be wise to go any further.
How Much Have YOU Changed?
Ideally, the person you're considering rekindling a flame with is wondering this question about you.
Personal growth is a must for every human being. If you look back at the memories, social media posts, and photos of your times with your ex and cringe a little, odds are you've made some significant progress since then. But if not, you should reevaluate if this time is any different than the last. If you're in the same place as last time, why would this time be different?
Why Did You Break Up Last Time?
Relationships end for specific reasons. Some people part ways due to simply growing apart. Others end things due to distrust, jealousy, cheating, or worse. Time does tend to blur a few things and make you wonder, "Why did we do that?" It's important to remember the answer to that question.
And if, in fact, you did forget the answer to that question, you need to explore it before making any significant decisions. If something pretty traumatic or emotionally charged ended your relationship last time, don't rush into anything without carefully considering whether or not it could happen again.
Why Do You Want to Get Back Together?
Investigating why you're thinking about getting back with your ex is important. It could be worth it if you've both truly evolved and are better people than last time. But if the best reason you can come up with is that you miss them or the sex was great, it might be time to reevaluate your priorities.
Getting back with an ex could create a genuinely healthy experience in certain circumstances. But always take your time and ask all the important questions before jumping back into it.