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These days, we’re all kinda fucked up in the head. I don’t think I'm spilling any tea when I say that. Our entire generation probably needs therapy. And a really common problem that seems to affect a lot of us, especially us gays, is extreme self-consciousness. Or, as the scientists call it, dysmorphia (no, it’s not contagious). I mean, I guess in some ways that’s just what happens when you give humans Photoshop and Instagram--they’re gonna like shit about the way they look because nobody really looks like those beautiful hunk-lords. The point is, there’s a good chance that when you hook-up with a boy, he’s secretly going to feel disgusted by his own body and be wondering the whole time if you even like him at all. Or perhaps you’re dating somebody right now who fits this category. Either way, we’re all hurt, aren’t we? So let’s just throw each other some bones. Here’s what you need to know if your lover is self-conscious. Depending on the severity of his wounds, it can take a lot to heal. For example, if he was bullied in school for having a big ass, then it’s going to be a real ordeal to reverse that programming of shame. One of your goals as his lover is to constantly reassure and remind him that you find him wholly attractive, including his big ass. He probably won’t believe at first, even though, like damn, he thicc. Self-consciousness is a virus that affects his ability to see himself clearly as you do. So be his loving, compassionate eyes. What this looks like in practice is giving him compliments on the parts of his body which he detests. If your man feels chubby and unloveable, let him know that for you, there’s nothing hotter than bears. If he’s got a scar that he’s self-conscious about, kiss it to let him that you’re attracted to his ENTIRE body, imperfections and all. It can take 1000 compliments to undo one insult. Undoing self-consciousness about one’s body is a long process, but the only way to reach the end of the journey of acceptance is to be guided along by the loving hand of a supportive man. In fact, it’s your duty to help your self-conscious lover, because if he starts feeling like you’re too good for him, he may leave you. So go out there and tell him how much you love his funny bent cock. Your relationship may depend on it!
September 13, 2019 — Andrew Christian
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