6 Things We Should All Learn from The Older Generation of Gays

Gurl, let’s be real—there’s a lot we can learn from our older queer siblings. While the new generation is out here swiping left, right, and upside down, the OG gays knew how to werk it without a single app. They didn’t just fight for their lives (literally) but for the culture, the spaces, and the community that many of us enjoy today. So, in the spirit of fabulousness, community, and a dash of sass, here are 6 things we should all learn from the older generation of gays.

1. Socializing in Person Is a Whole Vibe

Listen, there’s nothing wrong with scrolling through the apps, but there’s something magical about actually interacting with real-life people, face-to-face. Our elders knew how to do it: meet a guy at the bar, flirt over a drink, maybe share a glance across the dance floor. It’s the kind of chemistry that can’t be replicated by pixels on a screen.

The older gays were out and about in the gayborhoods, and they owned their space. Whether it was cruising in parks, striking up convos at cafes, or partying in clubs—queer folks weren’t just friends; they were a family. So take a note from them: the next time you’re out, put down your phone and strike up a convo with a hot stranger. Trust.

2. Keep the Spaces Gay—Including Playing Porn at Bars

Girl, have you ever walked into a gay bar, and it felt… not so gay anymore? Like, suddenly there are a bunch of straight bachelorette parties, and you’re just over here like, “This ain’t the vibe.” Well, the older generation had it figured out: keep gay spaces GAY. And honey, one way they did it was by boldly playing gay porn in bars! Yes, you heard that right—nothing says "This is a gay space!" like a little adult entertainment playing in the background to ward off the straights and keep things extra queer.

So, don’t be afraid to take ownership of your spaces. Keep the gay bars unapologetically gay, and don’t let anyone water down our community’s magic.

3. Affordable, Diverse Gayborhoods Were Once a Thing

Before gentrification turned gayborhoods into overpriced real estate playgrounds for the rich and fabulous (well, mostly just the rich), queer folks carved out their own spaces—affordable, diverse, and teeming with community. Back in the day, these neighborhoods were sanctuaries for anyone who felt out of place elsewhere. You could actually afford to live in the city, be surrounded by queerness, and thrive without draining your bank account.

Today, we need to remember that these neighborhoods weren’t just about being fabulous—they were about affordable living for everyone. We can take a page out of their playbook and advocate for diverse, inclusive, and affordable spaces again. Let’s bring the soul back to our communities!

4. Fighting for Rights Was Non-Negotiable

Honey, the older generation didn’t just party—they protested. They fought for the rights we enjoy today, from marriage equality to protections against discrimination. And they didn’t just do it for themselves—they did it for future generations of queers to live out loud and proud.

These trailblazers knew the value of activism, and it’s something we should never forget. The fight isn’t over, boo. Our queer elders didn’t just throw glitter around; they threw themselves into the front lines to secure a future where being LGBTQ+ wouldn’t be a crime. It’s our duty to continue that work, making sure every queer person, especially those in marginalized communities, has the freedom to thrive.

5. Bathhouse Culture Was the Original Hookup App

Let’s talk about bathhouses. Yes, the steamy, hot, queer-as-hell bathhouses where people socialized, hooked up, and found community. Before apps, bathhouses were the OG cruising spots, a space where you could be unapologetically yourself. It wasn’t just about sex (okay, mostly it was, but stay with me). It was about freedom, expression, and the community built around these spaces. They were safe havens where queer folks could come together and let go of society’s judgment.

Now, this isn’t to say we need to bring back the bathhouse culture exactly as it was, but there’s a lesson here in creating queer spaces where sexuality can be celebrated without shame. Let’s not forget where we came from—and maybe take inspiration for the future.

6. They Were Fearless in Their Authenticity

At the end of the day, if there’s one thing we should learn from the older generation of gays, it’s to live authentically. They had to live through times when being queer was way more dangerous than it is today, but that didn’t stop them from strutting their stuff, standing up for their rights, and living fabulously out loud.

Whether it’s rocking a leather harness to a Pride parade or fighting against injustice, the older generation never let the world tell them who to be. And that’s a lesson we can always use. So, let’s embrace our queerness, our community, and our history—because being queer isn’t just about existing; it’s about thriving in a world that wasn’t always kind to us.

Final Thoughts

Our queer elders built the foundation for the vibrant, diverse, and fabulous community we enjoy today. Let’s not forget the lessons they’ve taught us—socialize in person, protect our spaces, fight for affordable gayborhoods, keep the activism alive, and celebrate our sexuality without shame. If we can keep these values alive, we’ll not only honor their legacy but make sure the future of queerness stays as fierce as ever. ✨