Alright, let’s talk about it. Hooking up with a virgin—a delicate topic, a unique experience, and if done right, a story that will have you smirking to yourself every time you hear the words “first time”.

Some people avoid virgins like they’re signing up for a full-time mentorship program, but listen—there are some serious perks to being someone’s first. So if you’re considering guiding a sweet, innocent soul into the pleasures of the flesh, here’s why you should absolutely say yes to the challenge.

1. You Get to Right Someone Else’s Wrongs

Let’s be real—most people’s first times are a disaster. Awkward, fumbling, possibly painful, and often ruined by a clueless straight dude named Chad who thinks lube is optional.

But YOU? You’re different. You have experience. You have wisdom. You have the power to make someone’s first time actually enjoyable—no weird fumbling, no bad angles, no disappointing finish. You can do what Chad never could: set the bar HIGH.

And trust me, they will NEVER forget you for that.

2. The Excitement? IMMACULATE.

Nothing—and I mean NOTHING—beats the raw enthusiasm of someone getting their first taste of pleasure.

It’s like handing a kid his first slice of birthday cake—except the cake is your [REDACTED], and the excitement is lust-fueled instead of sugar-induced.

One minute they’re shy, the next they’re grabbing, gasping, and discovering just how good life can be. It’s like you unlocked a cheat code in their brain. And the best part? They’re eager to please.

3. You Might Just Unleash a Hidden Freak

Some of these “innocent” virgins? Oh honey, they were just waiting for an excuse.

I’ve seen it happen. One night they’re all nervous and cute, and the next, they’re flipping you over like they’ve been secretly watching tutorials. 😳

Some people just need a little nudge before their inner beast comes out. And guess who gets to witness the transformation firsthand? YOU.

4. No Ex-Drama, No Baggage, Just Pure Fun

One of the biggest pros of hooking up with a virgin? NO EX DRAMA.

You don’t have to deal with:

❌ An emotional monologue about their toxic ex.

❌ Weird jealousy issues from someone still hung up on their past.

❌ Passive-aggressive comments about how you remind them of their ex’s best friend’s cousin.

Nope! You get a fresh, eager partner with no messy history—just clean, untainted fun.

5. The Power Trip Is Real (And Delicious)

Okay, maybe this one is a little toxic, but let’s be honest—there is a certain power in being someone’s first.

You are forever imprinted in their memory as the one who:

✔ Showed them the ropes.

✔ Introduced them to their own pleasure.

✔ Possibly ruined them for everyone else.

It’s a little diabolical, but also kinda hot. 😈

6. Because You Were Once a Virgin Too

At the end of the day, we’ve all been there. We all had a first time. And wouldn’t it have been nice if someone experienced, patient, and actually GOOD had been there to guide us?

So, if you get the chance to make someone’s first time amazing, take it! Show them how good it can be. Set them on the right path. Give them a story they’ll tell their future boyfriends with a blush.

And hey—you never know. Today’s nervous virgin might just turn into your freaky long-term partner down the line. Stranger things have happened. 😉