Ask Agatha: I Unknowingly Had Sex With an Escort

Dear Agatha,

So, I have a little confession that’s been eating away at me for the past week, and I need your advice—mostly to confirm whether I should feel proud or freaked out.

Here’s what went down: I was staying at this adorable little bed and breakfast a couple of hours away from home for a weekend getaway. You know, just me, a cozy apartment, and a little solo vacation to clear my head. Of course, like any self-respecting gay man looking for some excitement, I decided to hop on the apps to see what the local scene had to offer. (When in a new city, right?)

Almost immediately, I got a message from this ridiculously hot guy—like, cover-of-a-romance-novel hot. Broad shoulders, defined muscles, the whole nine yards. He invited me over for a little “hot fun” (his words, not mine), and, well… I’m not one to turn down an opportunity when the universe presents such blessed circumstances.

So, I went over, we had a great time, wink-wink. Afterward, we even chatted for a while—talked about life, swapped Instagram handles, you know, the whole “post-hookup-let’s-pretend-we’re-human” routine. I left feeling like I just won the gay lottery. I mean, this guy was hot, like leave-you-speechless hot.

Fast forward to a week later. I’m listening to one of my favorite gay podcasts (they always get into the juiciest gossip), and they mentioned this website called where guys, uh... sell their services online. Now, I’ve never used such a site, but my curiosity got the better of me, and I figured I’d do a little browsing to see who’s on there. Purely research purposes, of course...

And who do I see on the front page, grinning at me with those same broad shoulders and piercing eyes? Yup. The hot guy from the apps—except now I know he’s a full-time escort. Like, not even one of those “part-time just to make some extra cash” types—no, no, this man is the real deal. He’s in-demand, premium, and apparently, people are paying a lot for his company.

Here’s the kicker: I didn’t have to pay a dime. He hit me up, not the other way around. And while part of me is like, “Hell yeah, I must be doing something right if he wanted to hook up for free,” the other part of me is like… “Wait. Did I just unwittingly hook up with a pro? Should I feel weird about this?”

Agatha, I’m torn. Should I feel flattered? Should I feel freaked out? Am I overthinking this, or should I be re-evaluating my life decisions?

Sincerely,

Adam

Dear Adam

I’m the one who feels like I hit the gay lottery just reading this. Look at you, seducing professional-grade eye candy without even knowing it! That’s what I call star quality, darling. 

First things first, you’re not the first (and certainly won’t be the last) to unknowingly end up in bed with an escort. If anything, it sounds like you had a fun, consensual experience with a gorgeous man, and honestly? That’s a win in anyone’s book. You got the platinum package, darling, and you didn’t even have to swipe your credit card!

Now, should you feel flattered? Absolutely! Escort or not, the fact that this in-demand Cuban stud actively sought you out—without you even being a paying customer—means you’re obviously exuding something pretty damn irresistible. Maybe it’s your charm, maybe it’s your looks, maybe it’s just that certain je ne sais quoi. Whatever it is, you clearly got his attention, and that’s a whole mood, babe.

You ask whether you should feel weird about it, and my answer is—why? This wasn’t some sneaky transaction where you got duped into something shady. You went into this with full autonomy, had an enjoyable time, and walked away no worse for wear (except for maybe a few lingering questions). And let’s be real—whether he’s a doctor, a lawyer, or an escort, it doesn’t change the fact that you both had a consensual, adult encounter. His line of work doesn’t make it any less hot.

Should you message him? Should you ask if he’s “on the clock” all the time, or if he’s interested in some more… personal interaction outside of work hours? Well, darling, that’s up to you. If you’re feeling adventurous, slide into those DMs and keep the conversation going. Who knows? Maybe you’ll end up with a professional and personal relationship. Or maybe it was just a one-time thing, and that’s okay too.

XOXO,

Agatha 💋