Listen up, you doomscrolling young whippersnappers. If there’s one thing us older gays know, it’s how to survive and thrive in this chaotic world. They’ve been through it all—fashion disasters, heartbreaks, questionable life choices (like that ex you refuse to talk about), and, most importantly, the ever-evolving gay mental health journey.

So, when the silver foxes and daddies of our community speak, we listen. If you’re feeling down, stuck, or just need a little mental health pick-me-up, here are five pieces of wisdom straight from the mouths of older gays who have been there, done that, and come out wiser (and still fabulous).

1. Write It Out (Yes, With a Pen, Like It’s 1994)

Journaling isn’t just for dramatic teenage angst—it’s therapy in a notebook. One wise older gay swears by personal writing with a good old-fashioned pen and paper—no notes app, no autocorrect, just raw, unfiltered thoughts hitting the page.

✍️ Why? Because putting your thoughts into words helps process emotions, reduce anxiety, and give clarity to all those feelings floating around in your head. Plus, it’s much cheaper than therapy (but still, go to therapy).

💡 Pro Tip: Feeling extra dramatic? Write love letters to your past self. Tell him what he needed to hear. Apologize for the bangs you got in 2014. Forgive yourself for that one night in Ibiza. Healing starts here.

2. Cooking (For Yourself, Your Man, or Your Imaginary Dinner Party Guests)

There’s something powerful about chopping, sautéing, and making something from scratch. One older gay says cooking a full, homemade meal for himself and his husband is his favorite form of self-care.

Why? Because cooking is grounding, sensory, and keeps you from eating overpriced takeout every night.

🍝 What to cook?

• Something nostalgic (grandma’s secret recipe or the first dish you ever made for a boyfriend).

• Something sexy (oysters, pasta, anything that makes you feel like an Italian housewife).

• Something healthy (because let’s be real, you can’t survive on espresso martinis alone).

3. Move That Body (Yes, Outside, In the Sun, Like a Functional Human)

We all know exercise is good for your mental health, but these older gays swear by one specific rule: do it outside, during daylight, every single day.

☀️ Why? Because sunlight = Vitamin D, better mood, and an excuse to wear cute athleisure.

🚴‍♂️ How?

• Take a stroll and make eye contact with hot joggers (for research purposes).

• Ride a bike instead of driving (bonus points if it’s a cute pastel-colored one).

• Try outdoor yoga—nothing says “I have my life together” like stretching in the park.

💡 Extra Credit: Get naked in a private outdoor hot spring. The wise gays say it’s divine for the soul (and, let’s be honest, the view).

4. Socialize Like It’s 1999 (Put Your Phone Down!)

Older gays knew how to socialize before apps took over the world, and their advice? Actually interact with people… in person.

🎭 Talk to strangers. Flirt with the barista, compliment someone’s outfit, ask an old man about his dog.

🍷 Have a standing dinner date with your bestie. Friendships need maintenance, like good skincare.

🪩 Go dancing. The gay elders say nothing boosts mental health like sweating it out on a dance floor.

💡 Bonus: If you have an ex you’re on good terms with, grab coffee and laugh about the disaster that was your relationship. Healing through humor.

5. Animals. That’s It. Animals.

You don’t need a therapist when you have a cat that judges you but secretly loves you. Many older gays swear that caring for animals is the ultimate mental health cheat code.

🐈 Get a cat. They are soft, dramatic, and have boundary-setting skills we could all learn from.

🐶 Volunteer at an animal shelter. Playing with puppies? Mood instantly boosted.

🦜 Feed the birds. It’s giving cottagecore grandpa energy, and we’re here for it.

💡 If you don’t have a pet, find a friend who does and visit them often. Free serotonin, no commitment.

Final Takeaway: The Gays Who’ve Been There Have the Best Advice

If you’re spiraling, stuck, or just need a mental reset, take a page from the older gays’ playbook: write, cook, move, socialize, and surround yourself with fluffy creatures.

Because babe, life is way too short to be miserable when there’s a world of joy, connection, and hot joggers waiting outside. 💖