Ask Agatha: Wasted Bottom Prep
Hey Agatha,
I really need your sage wisdom on this one. My name is Leo, I’m 29, and I live in the fabulous city of Miami. I’ve been dating and hooking up a lot, enjoying the beautiful bodies and sun-kissed vibes that come with living here. But lately, I’ve been running into a rather frustrating problem with my hookups.
You see, I take my preparation for anal sex very seriously. I spend at least an hour cleaning and prepping to make sure everything is perfect. I want my partner and I to have the best experience possible, and that requires some dedicated time with my showerhead and a lot of patience. But here’s where the issue lies—time and time again, when my hookup finally arrives, they get off so quickly that they don’t even utilize all the preparation I’ve put into it. They orgasm prematurely, and we never even get to the main event that I’ve spent all that time getting ready for.
It’s incredibly frustrating, and I can’t help but feel like I’m wasting my time and energy. Don’t get me wrong, I understand that things don’t always go as planned in the heat of the moment, but this is becoming a pattern. It’s reached a point where I’m dreading the whole process, but I still crave that connection and intimacy.
What do you suggest, Agatha? How can I avoid these time-wasting tops who make me prep for nothing? Is there a way to filter out the ones who are more likely to deliver on the promises of pleasure?
Help a frustrated bottom out!
Best,
Leo the Prepared
Darling Leo,
First of all, let me just say how much I admire your dedication to ensuring a perfect experience for both you and your partners. The world could use a few more considerate lovers like you! Now, let’s dive into this conundrum of yours, because it’s time to turn your frustration into fabulous solutions.
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Pre-Screening is Key: Before you dive into the whole cleaning and prepping routine, consider meeting your potential partners for a casual coffee or a drink first. This little pre-date can help you gauge their vibe, figure out their stamina, and get a sense of their kinks and hang-ups. Plus, it’s a great way to build a bit of chemistry and anticipation before you hit the sheets.
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Communicate Your Expectations: When you’re chatting with a potential hookup, be upfront about what you’re looking for. Let them know that you’re someone who takes preparation seriously and that you’re in it for a quality experience. This might scare off the time-wasters and attract those who are genuinely interested in a fulfilling encounter.
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Ask the Right Questions: During your coffee pre-date or even during your initial chats, ask about their sexual preferences and experiences. Are they quick to finish, or do they enjoy taking their time? Do they have a history of premature endings, or do they pride themselves on delivering the full package? These conversations can provide valuable insights into whether they’re worth your time and effort.
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Quality Over Quantity: Sometimes, less is more. Instead of juggling multiple hookups, focus on finding a few reliable partners who you know will deliver the experience you’re after. Build a rapport with them and enjoy the benefits of a more consistent and satisfying sex life.
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Don’t Be Afraid to Educate: If you do find yourself with a partner who tends to finish too quickly, consider gently guiding them towards techniques that can help them last longer. This could include teasing, edging, or simply taking things slower. Remember, sex is a two-way street, and both partners should be invested in making it a memorable experience.
Leo, remember that your time and effort are precious, and you deserve partners who appreciate and reciprocate that dedication. By pre-screening your hookups and setting clear expectations, you can weed out the time-wasters and find those who are truly worth your while. So, grab that coffee, have those candid conversations, and soon enough, you’ll be enjoying the full rewards of your impeccable preparation.
XOXO,
Agatha 💋